Geez

It's been a while since I posted. I didn't realize. I'm a blogger slacker.


Jacelyn is out of school, and somewhat enjoying her summer. She misses school, and she misses her friends, and I haven't yet arranged any time to spend with another child, so she's been surrounded by grown-ups, with the exception of a family birthday party last week. I think she's slightly depressed about it. Her routine is out the window - no bedtime, no set getting up time. She's a mess, and it's affecting her in a noticeable way. I think she needs to get back on a routine, and I think I need to get up with some school or girl scout moms about a playdate. She literally seems depressed. Poor thing.

I'm thinking about cutting my hair. I'm very torn about it - I want to, but then I don't. I like the idea of a new cut and actually having a hair style, but I'm concerned about the maintenance. I'm afraid the cut I want will not look good on me. And what I'm looking at is short. I would be going from long hair that falls to my lower back to hair above my ears. Big, big change. I'm terribly nervous. I don't know if I'm feminine enough to pull off a short haircut. I don't know if I'm confident enough to pull off a short haircut. I mean, all I ever do now is clip my long hair up in a bun for work or back in a ponytail at home, so it's not like my face isn't front and center now. But I'm very freaked out. My long hair is super low maintenance - wash it, pull it back, go. Zero primp time. However, that shows, too. Isn't it about time, as I'm knocking on thirty, that I spent a little time on my appearance? I suppose I can't go through my entire life counting on my sparkling personality to win people over. I have less than stellar skin, however, and a mouthful of charmingly crooked teeth (that I am very superstitious about in regards to my trumpet playing, BTW), and wouldn't short hair just highlight my considerable facial flaws? My big nose with the smeary freckle. The fact that I am, as my sister delights in pointing out, covered in moles. My uneven eyes. But again, since I always wear my hair pulled tightly back, all those are already on display. I want a funky haircut. Something that I can pomade. I just don't know what I want to do. I'll keep thinking about it.

I'm going to get to work now. There's a lot of stuff going on right now in my world, but none of it that I can really get into right now. Bombshell type of stuff. Makes me tired thinking about it. I'll talk to you all soon! And Teresa, I love you and miss you and hope you're doing well!