Saturday, October 28, 2006


I have nothing to say. Me! I have nothing to say. Can you believe it?

There is no pressing issue, nothing weighing on my mind. Jacelyn hasn't done anything terrible or amusing in the last 24 hours. Life has been stagnating along at its' normal operating level, and nothing eventful has occurred.

I can't wait for the GGAF next weekend. I was just looking at their website: here. We had a lot of fun last year. I would like to actually maybe purchase something this year, but that would be flagrantly breaking my 'no new stuff' rule.

Two more hours at work and then I'm bound for home. Actually, I'm bound for the Halloween celebration out where Brian's father works. Then dinner at McDonald's, then I think we're all supposed to go bowling tonight. Tomorrow there's church, and then we're celebrating Brian's birthday at some point, and then I think we're going to the fair. Michelle and I went halfsies on some speakers for his car. To me, that would be a horrible gift, but he will love it. Hopefully.

That's about it. I'm tired, and bored. Ready to go home. I wish that someone, anyone, would take the yummy homemade cake that's in the breakroom away from me before I eat it all. I've already had two pieces today. And there's still two hours left in my day, and the thought of those two hours being entirely cake-free is making me upset.

Well, I certainly said a lot for having nothing to day. Good weekend to all.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Picture Day

I absolutely HATE mornings. Today is picture day for Jacelyn, and the pressure was on for her hair to look good. Now, anyone who knows me knows that hair isn't exactly something I spend a lot of time on. I'm lucky if I remember to brush my own hair. Jacelyn's hair is a nightmare. Thin, baby fine, and cowlicks, EVERYWHERE. We have decided to let her bangs grow out, because she has a cowlick right on her forehead that sends her bangs askew if they are short. So her hairstyle is in an awkward, growing-out stage. I spent twenty minutes on her hair this morning. I finally ended up just pulling her hair into two pigtails in front, getting her bangs out of her face and leaving the back of her hair down. It took me forever to get the two pigtails aligned properly. The blame for bad hair will fall solely on my shoulders if her pictures turn out poorly.

I was a little dismayed yesterday when I opened her backpack. I knew picture day was coming, because it was on the calender, but that was all I knew. So yesterday, THE AFTERNOON BEFORE they take pictures, they send home the flier with all the package and payment options. The day before. And payment is due with the order form the next day. That might be OK for some people, but for me, if I don't budget it in advance, there's a chance the money won't be there. Last night, after church, I was looking at the picture flier and wondering what to do. I couldn't not buy her first school pictures! Brian's mother and sister were torn, when I asked for their thoughts. Brian's mother said we didn't even know if the pictures were going to be good (but I'm biased, I think pretty much every picture of my daughter is good). I called Brian to get his thoughts, and he told me to sign up for the biggest package and he would bring money with him that night, because he was coming into town. Ok, whew.

This morning, after spending far too long on Jacelyn's hair, I had to rush around to get myself ready. I poked a sleeping Brian and asked him where the picture money was, and he said by his wallet. So I go to retrieve said money, and the amount is $10 short. I poked him again, and asked if he had the other $10. He mumbled no. I wanted to meltdown. I was stressed because I was running late, and because I didn't have any cash on me and didn't have time to stop by an ATM. And because I had told him the night before, multiple times, how much the amount was, and that I didn't have any cash, and he still didn't bring enough. He always does that. Example: I will say, because I know him and his ways: "Brian, I need twenty dollars for ______ for Jacelyn, and I have no money. If I do not have $20 for Jacelyn for _____, she will not be able to do it. Please understand that I DO NOT have the money, any money, and need the full $20". He will say "Ok, Ok, geez, I'm not an idiot" and then give me twelve dollars. It's a vicious, dumb pattern that makes me want to choke him.

AND, last night, on the phone, he started complaining about his rent going up when he renewed his lease. How long did he renew it for? 7 MONTHS. One of us will not survive if we have to do this for another seven months. He really picked the wrong time to mention that. Frustration has been simmering for some time now, and frankly, I'm either going to boil over or burn out. I think I'm going to attempt a conversation with him this evening, after work. Attempt being the key word. It will be another drive of doom. Lacking privacy in the household, we have to drive around if we want to have a discussion and/or argument, and even though I will try my hardest to stay on my best behavior and watch my mouth, this has all the promise of an argument. Sigh. I don't want and don't intend to be disrespectful or mean. I just want him to know a few things. Like how his daughter doesn't talk about him when he's not there. About how she has become a bed-wetter for a couple of days after he leaves. The fact that he might be golden at work right now, but he's poo-brown with his family, and I don't mean me, I mean his parents and sister. That people joke about him not existing, about me just making him up.

Here's hoping the pictures and the discussion go well.

Friday, October 20, 2006

The First Report Card

Jacelyn puked in another parent's car yesterday on the way home from her class field trip. The woman said, "I have four kids, those things don't bother me". Whew. She was very nice about it.

I had a conference with Jacelyn's teacher today, during which I got her report card. The front cover, both inner pages and the back was a listing of skills, achievements, goals, etc. and the 'grade' for each. She got an 'S' for 'Demonstrates Strength' in almost everything. The only 'G's that she received (stands for grade/age understanding) were for 'Knows Jesus' and some other religious thing, and then she got 'G's in all of her special classes--technology, library and art. Much to my smug satisfaction, she did get all 'S' in one special class---music! Da da da da! Mama's girl! It means nothing, or at least very little, I know, but I still will enjoy pointing that out. "She got a G in all her special classes except music, she demonstrates strength in music" I will tell people, anyone who will listen, probably.

Her teacher said she listens very well (who does? my daughter? wha?), she is one of the best helpers in the class (that's more believable), and she is a smart little girl (I've known that, duh). Sigh. My big, smart girl. Growing up waaaaay too fast. So that's it, then.

Saturday, October 14, 2006


Ok, here we go, the instructions:
The Rules of this tag game are:
1. Grab the book nearest to cheating!
2. Open to page 123.
3. Scroll down to the fifth sentence.
4. Post text of next 3 sentences on to your blog.

'We will write out the dominant seventh in C major and C minor, in its three positions, following each position by the appropriate position of the tonic chord, according to the foregoing directions for the leading of the parts or voices. Let the student write out the same Progressions in the remaining major and minor scales, in the spaces provided. Look out for the chromatically raised thirds in dominant chords of the minor scales.'

from Harmony Book for Beginners, Preston Ware Orem

I'm at work, what did you expect. I had this book nearby because I was thinking about reading it, but now I'm not so sure.

I tag Jen, TX Jen, Teresa and Mike.


What a looooooooooooong day this has been. Already. And its not even 11:30 yet. And I just heard from Michelle - Jacelyn wet the bed at some point, apparently in a spectacular manner. And instead of walking into the bedroom and waking up Brian, who is in town, Brian's mother called Michelle, who had to come over and take care of the problem. AND, she got Jacelyn dressed and fed her breakfast, all without waking up her dear brother. She didn't wake Brian up until she had to leave. CRAZY. He is her father. Make him get up and deal with it.

I'm so ready for a day off. I'm so ready to just relax. That is my goal for tomorrow. To relax. I'll let you know how it goes.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

So Tired

Yesterday was my day off. I got up early, took Jacelyn to school. Included a note in her folder about her cough, saying I was medicating it (she reeked of Vicks) and that she feels fine but if I needed to come back and get her I would. Got home, cleaned up, did some laundry. Spent three hours at the commisary with Brian's mother and Michelle. Came home, unloaded the metric ton of groceries and got it all put away. I was walking through the kitchen, thinking about a ham sandwich, when the phone rang.

It was Jacelyn's school. Before the woman could tell me what was wrong, I said, "Let me guess, she isn't feeling well". She wasn't, but it wasn't because of her cough. "She was running in the playground and fell and hit the ground with her face" the nurse explained. I asked if she was OK, and the nurse said yes, she was, but she had a small cut on her nose and under her eye, nothing that needed stitches. "Do I need to come get her?" I asked. The nurse asked Jacelyn if she was feeling well, and Jacelyn said she was. Then she put Jacelyn on the phone, and Jacelyn started crying and saying she wanted to come home. That was enough for me - all thoughts of ham sandwiches gone, I hopped in the car - Michelle decided to come along - and went to get her.

I got into the office and the entire staff was around her, patting her, rubbing her face. Her back was to me at the moment. Sister Patricia was talking to her, and looked up at me. "She looks like a losing prizefighter" was what she said, and I laughed. After all, what's a little cut and scrape? When Jacelyn got up, I literally gasped a little. Sister said, "Well, I told you". She did look like she had been on the losing end of a fight - black eye, dirty, tear-stained face, cut up eye and nose. Poor baby.

We went home, and she seemed fine, but the eye with the cut underneath it was very red and watery. We ended up at an Urgent Care facility (which meant lots and lots of waiting), where it was discovered that Jacelyn had a corneal abrasion - a cut on her actual eye itself. Very painful, from what I've heard. They sent me home with a prescription for some antibiotic goo and a directive to return there today for a follow-up. We left there around 4:00 or so. I dropped Jacelyn and Michelle off at Michelle's apartment and went to Wal-Mart to get the scrip filled. An hour later her medicine was ready, and I went back and got her. Took her to Brian's mother's house, got her into a nightgown and pinned her down for an application of the eye medicine (not fun), and then had to meet up with the girl scout troop to drop off her fund raising money and pay her dues and for her ballet ticket.

At the girl scout meeting word had gotten out. When I walked in one mother said, "Gracie said Jacelyn got hurt and had to go home - is she ok?". I told the story, and there was much 'poor-baby-ing' all around. On the way out I ran into another girl from school who asked me, "How is Jacelyn's eye? Is she ok?". It was sweet and made me happy to know that she has little friends.

Back home, where Jacelyn was knocked out asleep on the sofa. I ate, cleaned up, woke her up and tried to coax some food into her. The poor baby was in agony. Worked around the house until 11pm, when I finally got Jacelyn into bed with me. She was restless all night - not crying, just tossing and turning and occasionally moaning. I couldn't sleep for a few hours, and when sleep finally did come it was fragmented. Every time Jacelyn moved I would wake up.

Got up early this morning, got ready for work. Got Jacelyn out of bed, fixed her some cereal and then went and picked up Michelle. Back to the house, medicate Jacelyn (a nightmare) and then off to work. I'm exhausted. At some point today I have to take her back to the urgent care center for a follow-up. I'm so tired. I'm so glad she's ok.

The Bernardo's are certain there's some sort of cover-up or conspiracy at hand at school. "I'll bet they were playing tag" I remember someone saying, in a very accusatory tone, as if they were playing with loaded firearms. Children, especially my child, are going to fall. Down, off things, out of things, onto things. It happens. And after some of the stories I heard yesterday about Brian and Michelle, I am not the only relative that added clumsy into the gene pool. They spent more than their fair share of time in the emergency room as children. No one pushed her, there was no plot, the child just fell. Good grief. Everyone wants to know "what really happened". Huh? They think there has to be more to the story. Because Jacelyn said that she fell on one of her classmates, and no one in the office mentioned that to me. Well, Jacelyn did say that she fell on Mitch, but she also said she fell on a rock the size of a car and had on three shoes at the time. Bless her sweet soul, Jacelyn has a very active imagination and her version of events cannot always be trusted.

I would like to know if she did fall on Mitch, and if she did, if he is ok. Other than I'm not worried. The doctor said these cuts generally heal in 24 hours. So hopefully by tomorrow all will be well. I'm not looking forward to a return trip to the urgent care - if we could have followed up with our doctor we could have made an appointment, been in and out, but whatever. As long as she gets better.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

It Happened!

Brian got his car, gave me his car. He got a 99 Acura Integra, white, 5 speed. It looks like this (not his car, but it looks kind of like it, without the wing on back):

I am now driving his Jetta, which looks like this (again, not my actual car):

So...whew. All taken care of. Brian is thrilled with his car, I am grateful for having something that gets me where I need to go. All is well with out automotive world. Relief!

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Movin' On Up

We got a note from Jack, Jacelyn's karate instructor, notifying us that she will be ready to test for her yellow belt Thursday. My baby is going to (possibly) be a yellow belt! I got to watch her in class for the first time yesterday, and it's the cutest thing in the world. Jack likes to yell at her - he'll get up to her and growl and yell and tell her, "Be mean! You're mean! Make a mean face!" and then she'll scowl at him. He called her a maniac at one point - as in, "Watch this, you boys watch this little girl do this, she's a maniac, you'll see". She loves it, so I'm cool with it.

Brian is possibly trading-in my Camry for a car for himself, and passing the Jetta along to me. If all goes well. Which I'm cool with, because I can't really afford a car payment right now. I'll let you know.

That's pretty much it. I'm ready for life to settle down into some sort of routine. I like routine, in some cases - the same old thing can sometimes be a good thing.