Thursday, July 23, 2009

If you don't have anything nice to say...

...don't say anything at all. I haven't had many nice things to say, lately. Good things have been happening, I'm sure they have. Good things and funny things have happened. I've been eating well and working out and physically, I feel better than I have in years. I've been stressed, though, and I was afraid I would just complain endlessly if I blogged, so I didn't blog. I will blog now, though, and try and get all of the complaining out of the way:

My husband's schedule has changed, which completely throws off our childcare. Now I will need childcare different days of the week, every week. Some weeks I might need childcare three days, some weeks I won't need it at all. Not a lot of affordable childcare providers who are willing to put up with such nonsense. That's stressful.

I need to add more hours at work, both for financial and workload reasons. I'll see less of my kids, have less time to do all the things I need to do, and also adds to my childcare issues. Stressful.

There's all sorts of other reasons why I'm stressed - my in-laws, my grandparents, girl scouts, church stuff, school stuff. But also, and I'm going to lay down some brutal bloggy honesty here: I'm having some problems in my marriage. Some pretty heavy stuff is going down, and I'm...well, I don't know what I'm doing. Trying to hold it all together? I guess. Every relationship has ups and downs, and right now we are pretty down. But we're working on it.

That's my confession for the day. I haven't been blogging, but I have been reading other blogs. Lurking, really, since I haven't been commenting as much as I would like. I miss my blog friends! I'm going to try and get back into the swing of things, and maybe it will help me to focus on the positive. I will try to be more positive. I will be more positive.

On a somewhat cheerier note, I had posted previously about my suspicion that I was sinking into depression. Since I made the changes to my diet and started exercising regularly and taking my vitamins like a good girl, things are much, much better now. Not to say that I don't get a little melancholy now and then, but I don't feel bad all the time like I did before. So there's something positive, something to be thankful for. I have many blessings in my life, and all my problems are relatively short-term problems that will work out. It's just hard to remember that sometimes.

1 comment:

Aimee said...

Well, you know I've missed you, and I'm sorry to hear you are so stressed. I'll pray for you and your marriage.

Glad to hear the exercise and vitamins are having a good effect. My doc once told me that a half hour of exercise is as good as a dose of Prozac. I know that's not always true, but I am glad to hear you're feeling better.

Thinking of you!